“To be in your children’s memories tomorrow. You have to be in their lives today”
Parenting is to many parents a mystery and many of them are in dire need of a parenting compass especially in today’s scenario. Without formal training, no preparation whatsoever, and with no vacations or breaks parenting is a full time job. What makes it even more difficult and demanding are the advances in technology, the multiple sources of information which children are bombarded with in present times and of course the gadgets and internet which parents have to compete with.
How then, can parents go about doing this challenging job of parenting? There are no established rules or laws readily available. It is more of a trial – error, trial – success method. However a few tips given below will surely be of help to all parents.
- Love and motivate your child by giving him/her the autonomy to make choices. Never force your ideas on them and do not use your child to fulfill your feelings of inadequacy by pressurising him/ her into a career of your choice. Remember God gave you a child to love and love unconditionally. Love them for who they are. Do not spend your whole time trying to correct them. Your love and motivation will ensure a secure emotional growth of your child. A pat on the back occasionally is the greatest motivation for any child.
- Communicate with your child. Silence is not golden in this context. The greatest gift you can give your child is your presence. Remember the saying ‘The family that prays together, stays together’. In today’s context the family that plays together, eats together, laughs together is the family in which the child is the happiest together. Communication will help in establishing and maintaining boundaries with your child. It will help you to compete with technology and also make you take note of the threats like cyber bullying & cyber crimes.
- Standard of living versus quality of living. Parents of today are taking great pains to improve the standard of living and children are being brought up in the lap of luxury. Children have forgotten how to excel by dint of hard work & efforts. Everything they need is given to them on a platter. They want everything easily through shortcuts and are not ready to work for achievement.
Parents have to stop being the ATM machines of their children, fulfilling every whim and fancy of their child, erroneously thinking that this would buy the love of their child. It is high time they realize that money & possessions are material and therefore transient. What remains is neither standards nor quality. Therefore spending quality time with your child and supporting them when they struggle is what parenting is all about. It is high time parents teach their child that ‘a bend in the road is not the end of the road ….. Unless you fail to make the turn.’
As parents, you need to appeal to their feelings, passions and beliefs. Once you are in sync with these aspects, disciplining your child is very simple.
So parents, to help your child grow well and develop a strong and wholesome personality against the backdrop of a world which is full of challenges is a challenge which you have to face. Are you ready for this –Parents of the 21st century??
Good Luck and Happy Parenting.